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The Table Wasn't Built for Us: 3 Moves Every Woman in Leadership Needs to Make Right Now
- Wendy Forsythe
- Jun 9
- 3 min read
Instead of a guest conversation, I'm sharing a keynote I gave to a room full of female executives from the real estate and mortgage industries at HousingWire's annual conference, The Gathering.
The title: "The Table Wasn't Built for Us: Stop Asking for a Seat."
Let me tell you about Anne Boden.
Anne spent nearly 30 years working her way up in the UK banking industry — all the way to COO of the country's largest bank. She pitched an idea about digital transformation. Twice. Both times, it was shot down. And then, at 54 years old, her CEO called her in and suggested it was probably time for her to think about retirement.
She left. And then she founded Starling Bank — the UK's first digital bank — which later sold for a billion dollars.
Anne's story is the centerpiece of my keynote at HousingWire's The Gathering, and it's the latest episode of X-Factor Marketing. But I don't love it because of the ending — I love it because of everything that happened in the middle. Because we've all been in that middle part.
Why Fighting for a Seat at the Table Isn't Working
The real estate and mortgage industries are full of talented women. But the data is clear: at the C-suite level — where authority, compensation, and real power live — the numbers haven't moved meaningfully in decades. It's not a pipeline problem. It's a systems problem. And the system wasn't designed for us.
So instead of continuing to optimize for a seat at a table that was never built for us, I believe we need to make three bold moves.
Move 1: Build Your Own Table
Find the people who share your values — men and women both. Build your own room. Create businesses, initiatives, and ideas around that community. Don't wait for permission to lead. Do it inside your company, inside your industry, inside your life. The table you build will grow.
Move 2: Advocate for Sponsorship Over Mentorship
I've been told to "get a mentor" my entire professional life. And while great mentors matter, mentorship alone doesn't kick down doors. Sponsorship does.
A mentor gives advice. A sponsor picks up the phone and says, "You need to talk to her." Men do this for each other constantly. Women need to do it more — and the good news is, you don't need to be at the top of the food chain to sponsor someone. Advocacy changes things, from any level.
Move 3: Be Bold Before You're Ready
We negotiate hard for our organizations. We fight for budgets and protect our teams. But when it comes to asking for things for ourselves? We wait. We wait until we feel 100% ready, until the plan is perfect, until we can see the whole path.
Here's the truth: that moment rarely comes. One of our greatest strengths as women is our ability to figure things out on the go. Lean into that. Ask for the opportunity before you feel completely ready. Take the swing. Be okay with a potential no — because the yes is waiting on the other side.
What Anne Boden's Story Really Teaches Us
Anne didn't have a perfect plan when she left that bank. She had clarity, conviction, and the willingness to start. That's it. And she built something historic.
The future of our industries is being built by women. Not by the ones waiting to be invited in — by the ones bold enough to build their own rooms.
Listen to this episode of X-Factor Marketing to hear the full keynote, including the data, the stories, and the three moves in full. It's one of the talks I'm most proud of — and I think it'll land for you wherever you are in your leadership journey.
Let's grow,
Wendy